May 30, 2013

Dr Aunt Liz

Me: Okay, sit right here so the doctor can fix it.
Nephew: Are you Doctor Aunt Liz?
Me: Yes I am. 

Officially a Doctor of Nursing (and none too soon, I might add!)

This is not a sneaky reference to anything in my personal life, it's just something I wish I would have said before he did.

 Also, it's 8 seconds long, so it's totally worth watching. 

May 26, 2013

Baby Birds

A little bird couple built their home in my parents' barbecue grill,
and now Los Padres are raising little baby Voldemorts.

May 21, 2013

You Know You're A Nurse When (Part 16)

You wake up on a tired morning to pray and you accidentally ask God to help you be "alert and oriented."

May 19, 2013

On Paralysis

At ATLS we learned about spinal cord trauma. How to manage a patient in the trauma bay after a recent paralysis. Usually the patient is so panicked about not being able to move his or her arms and/or legs that he or she is screaming, yelling and in shock. It can be distracting, but there are often other seriously life threatening issues occurring so you always have to go back to the ABCs. Treat the biggest threat to life first.

He jumped off of something and landed on his head. Broke his neck. Immediately yelled to his friends, "Guys! I can't move my arms or legs." After he recovered, he had a tiny bit of movement of his biceps. Nothing below the nipple line. Every time we’d go into his room, it was just so solemn. A lot of tears as the realization that everything he’d dreamed about his life was no longer real.

My friend met a guy who broke his back in an accident. Was paralyzed from the waist down. The neurosurgeon came in to talk about the surgery he’d need to do in order to stabilize the fracture. “Will I be able to walk again after the surgery?” “No.” And the realization that he’d never be able to walk again. His family told him they still wanted him around as he wondered if he’d rather have died.

I woke up late and stretched my arms overhead. Realized for the first time how miraculous it is that I can do that. I can stretch from fingers to toes and walk for hours in the nighttime air and ride my bike and move myself to place to place. I should wake up every morning with a profound sense of gratitude for the amazing life I am living and the body I’ve been given.

Please don’t jump or dive into things when you don’t know their depth or off of things that are too tall to be jumped from, wear a seat belt with a lap and a shoulder belt, keep your kids safe in a car seat, don’t text while driving, don’t drive drowsy, don’t keep a loaded gun where it can hurt someone innocent, don’t ever point a gun at someone even in jest, and please oh please be grateful for every day in your blessed, moving body.

May 17, 2013

I spent the day at ATLS.

Here is what I learned:

People in the trauma bay should always have a lower heart rate than the patient, unless [the patient is] coding. 

Kids are just little adults, but they have big heads, rubber bones, and they heal like ET. 

May 15, 2013

Thank You, Urban Dictionary For Providing This Moment

Remember that time in like 2008 that it was really cool to look your name up on urban dictionary
Well, maybe I did that today maybe. 

Nailed it. Especially the part about being close to perfect, oh, and also delusional. Oh wait...

May 13, 2013

Reflections on the Past: May 13

I am twenty three
things are not
yet as they will be

we are sitting on 
the library perch
in bare feet

and I am either 
crying or sad
while he is affirming

fleeting contentment
like napping
in the late afternoon

and waking
just as the sun
is setting

May 11, 2013

The thing about baseball

is that when I watch it I want to be like my dad.

And when I think about baseball I think about that time
S-- and I finally went to a game and
it started to rain
I don't even think we got to watch an inning
it started pouring
so we took ourselves,
that blue plaid blanket and
went up under the white canvas
probably sang some neil diamond and
talked about the romance of baseball
the classiness of pinstripes and clean-shaven faces
redemption and home runs


May 10, 2013

So, I got a new job.
You probably already heard,
but if you didn't,

it's in trauma

I have to say it quiet because I still can't believe it's real life.

May 5, 2013

If you don't say something...then, in a sense, isn't your silence a form of consent and complicity? -Jonathan Katz

Last night I went to a bonfire. There was a guy there who started this absurd and offensive racially (and otherwise) inappropriate dialogue, which I'm sorry to tell you I participated in. I could defend myself and say I did so minimally, that I didn't say anything as shocking as what you're probably imagining, but really, that's not the point. The point is that I failed to stop or leave or change a conversation that never should have happened in the first place. 

Of course today I watched this TED talk by Jonathan Katz (it gets fantastic about minute 12 or so). He said, "If you don't say something...then, in a sense, isn't your silence a form of consent and complicity?" I started to reflect on how I handled, or in this case, didn't handle the situation. The way my silence indicated consent, my laughter indicated complicity and my comments indicated concession.

I wish I had asked him to stop.
I wish I had asked him to tone it down.
I wish I hadn't laughed at what he said.
I wish I hadn't contributed in any way. 

But life isn't about regret. It's about change. And so, here I am, Internet, committing to do it differently next time. I don't know exactly how or what I'll do to handle it in a sincere, direct, and honest fashion, but I'm committing to you that I will do it differently, because I will not be a silent bystander to hatred or oppression. 

May 2, 2013

Hey Old Gal

 Love that dog,
like a bird loves to fly
I said I love that dog
like a bird loves to fly
Love to call him in the morning
love to call him
“Hey there, Sky!”
-Sharon Creech-

I’m gonna miss you little lady. 
All your howling at the sirens and tail wagging and fast eating and blurry picture taking and shedding on the carpet and licking me when I'm sad and letting me use you as a foot rest while I read. 

You're a good dog, Old Gal. 
Old Belle. 

May 1, 2013

When I Become a Rapper

I'll start saying things like:

Now I may not be the worst or the best, but you gotta respect my honesty. And I may break your heart, but I don’t really think there’s anybody as bomb as me.  -Ludacris

Keep reppin’ me. Do it to the death of me. X in the box cause ain’t nobody checkin me. –Nicki Minaj

I see the future, but live for the moment. Makes sense, don’t it?
I make dollars. I mean billions.
I’m a genius. I mean brilliant.

But most importantly, and in all seriousness, who doesn’t want to have this kind of control of the English language?