"Scared is what you’re feeling. Brave is what you’re doing.”
If anything applies to my life right now that does. Today I laid in bed most of the day after taking anxiety medicine and got up long enough for a walk, for therapy, to spend some time with my mom (the kindest and most validative person on the planet). Today there was a lot of crying. A LOT OF CRYING. But I'm still here. I may be scared out of my mind and be unable to eat because I'm so wound up, but that doesn't matter.
BRAVE IS WHAT I'M DOING
Brave is getting out of my bed to take my dog on a nice long walk before therapy. Brave is all the work I’m doing to improve myself: at therapy, with my family, in my other relationships. Brave is buying a house and painting it by myself. Brave is changing electrical outlets and meeting new people, and talking to people when it’s scary. Brave is going to work even when my brain feels like I'm never going to be okay and might even die while I'm there. Brave is being compassionate and helping people through their struggles even as I am engulfed in my own. Brave is setting boundaries and standing up for what is right. Brave is dating. Brave is choosing to be vulnerable with people who have earned my vulnerability. Brave is saying no when something social is beyond my emotional reach. Brave is cuddling in bed with my dog while wishing I could disappear, dissolve into nothing. Brave is every day I get out of my bed and do something, literally any little thing that may help me someday feel better than I do today.