On reading and watching tragedies. Also, spoiler alerts.

I’m reading a book called They Both Die at the End. 

I don’t know what it’s about but I can imagine it doesn’t have a happy ending. I’ve always had an affinity for books that are what my mom calls “oppressive.” My mother’s nickname is Pollyanna, so you can imagine that she doesn’t share this affinity. One of my favorite books as a kid was from the Scholastic book fair in fourth grade called Mick Harte was Here. On the first page, maybe even the first line?  his sister (the narrator) tells you that Mick died. She’s writing a book about how he died; he wasn’t wearing a helmet and got hit by a car on his bike. (Was this also a precursor to my life in trauma? Probably). 

I also remember as an eight year old loving the movie ET. You know how everyone was afraid of that movie as a kid? Not me. The part where they are doing CPR and then shocking ET and then he comes back to life! My little heart rejoiced. 

For the last 13 years I’ve been slowly working my way through The Complete Short Stories of Ernest Hemingway. Not a one has had a happy ending. In the first one, the wife accidentally shoots and kills her husband on a hunting trip. In the second, a teenager accidentally gets stabbed in the femoral artery while pretend playing matador and bleeds out in minutes. These are the things I read. 

The Fault in Our Stars

Me Before You 

Books that make me sob my eyes out. 

I love an emotional and meaningful death. Dobby in Harry Potter is one example. Also Snape. 

I am pro catharsis. 

So I think it’s strange how I recently read The Song of Achilles and was surprisingly sad at the end because he died. Well not just he died, but that he died because of hubris. That’s the problem though! I knew he died because, hello, I watched Hercules as a kid. I took 9th grade English and knew about Greek tragedies and such. I don’t know why I was expecting something different out of this book, but I was so disappointed in Achilles. He should have made better choices! But he didn’t. He died. 

I was so disappointed in him that I picked up They Both Die at the End. How is this supposed to make me feel better??